suspect says he doesn't like kids, lies

[scubatankfilledwithfarts]

Sometimes Spike remembers his motto- the one against women and dogs and kids— and he has to shake his head at himself. Who was he kidding, exactly, thinking with the inner circle he has that he’d avoid it forever. Forever bachelor, little responsibility.

[it would be too quiet, he knows]

Precocious is what you’d call the usual little booger eater. They cry for what they want, if they’re tired, if their food is touching.

“Unca Spike, what happens when you die?”

Familiar jade green look up from a round little face, belonging to the brat who has bullied her way once again into his lap despite Spike all but throwing her off about 4 times. She’s determined, he’ll give her that.

His face-and-soul journey go like this: she’s 8, is she old enough to know about death? Isn’t this the little girl who’d flushed her own (thankfully dead) goldfish down the toilet with a manic glee in those eyes? The bounty hunter wonders what her parents would tell her— no doubt Badou would fumble with some soliloquy about balls of gas and the line between heaven and limbo, lightening up the void with the sounds of happy laughter.

Faye wouldn’t be much better, she’d probably avoid looking into those eyes so like her own and try to change the subject (and if she thinks back on what void she slept in for 50 years in the dark, well, that isn’t his business). She would hold her just a little bit tighter that night, too.

Ed would go for something complicated to make sure the kid got all the scientific angles, then offer to put her brain into a robot, and Jet- why, he’d also fumble with something grounding and real-- a boat either sails or sinks on the sea--no wonder he and Badou get along so well.

"Unca Spike! Mama said you can't ignore me. S'rude," the little girl tuts at him, lower lip jutted out just like her father's.

"And I'm known for my infinite kindness, I know," he placates. "When you die-- I guess your heart just stops, here--" He places his open palm over his chest. "But maybe--" For a man trapped in what might be in a dream for years, he sure isn't certain what to say with those big eyes with the entire universe reflected in them looking up at him. That's a lot of pressure-- he wipes sweaty palms against his slacks.

"I bet it's like holding someone's hand before you cross the street. Hand in hand." Yeah, that sounds okay. Being gently led by the hand.

"No, what happens when YOU die," Amelia Ed Naoto Nill Nails-Valentine insists, a little worry line puckering between her brows. "Do I get all your money?"

Spike gazes down at her for all of two seconds before bursting into laughter. It's a relief, dizzying relief. He'd nearly forgotten who he was talking to for a moment: not a child, but the very not normal child of his familyriends. Undaunted, Lee huffs--

"Unca Spike!"

And shrieks when Spike scoops her up in his arms to spin her around the room, the lights blurring around them, her laughter ringing--

Booger eaters are the damndest creatures.

"Like I've GOT any money!"